... the President's Cup
(The QLL? Wassat? Some sort of futuristic failed transport system? Come ahn.) So we lost to the MMers by a whisker, then we beat up on Oxford and Beds & Herts and so we came to today and a match with London, who had the only 100 per cent record left in the cup. Well, we sure showed them huh?
No, actually, we didn't.
We got smashed 45-28.
How did we lose? Let me count the ways (and forget about Robert Willer's absence).
First I blame the rail infrastructure of our nation. You bastards. You engineering bastards. For it was on this poxy Sunday that Nic was prevented from joining us since all trains from Milton Keynes were cancelled. They'll say it was "planned". Like that's some sort of bloody excuse. Though being one person down and watching the other side getting enough two pointers to soon rip the match from your reach when we couldn't get our own is an excellent excuse for our defeat. However, I'm not entirely sure Nic would have made it close enough for us to go WOOOOOHHH that was close.
All I can think of are my dastardly mistakes: Moldovan flag? WRONG. Staying stchum during the Guernsey .gg internet domain thing. IDIOT. And finally, for my coup de grace, claiming Slough is the home of the Tesco HQ when it asked for a Hertfordshire
town. I am certainly not blaming it on the fella who set them, who goes by the mysterious codename 'Teflon'.
(Hey, at least we comfortably won the friendly that happened to be the President's Cup season opener from 2005. Our memories are long and they rule.)
So the season record is 50/50. We'll be lucky if ... I was going to twist some old movie quote into new surreal hilarity here, but I just cannae be arsed. I knew we should have taken a sabbatical year.
Once again I blame the trains for everything. I also blame the trains for my unwillingness, some might call it bone idle laziness, to write original President's Cup friendlies. They used to be a weekend ritual of frenetic despair and sadistic obscurity. I have, however, held back the one I did for the time Oxford visited The Castle. Pity they left before they could do it because I was so unbelievably, shockingly, disgracefully late (hmmm, was that almost an hour
?). Guess whose fault that was. Hint: they used to go CHOO-CHOO. Now they hum like the devil having a nap in a power station. OF EVIL.
But you know what? This will cheer you up
. It makes me cry with strange, undiluted happiness every time I watch it.
Here's that friendly from last month...President's Cup Friendly 19/10/08Round 1
1a Born in Vienna in 1804, which Romantic composer wrote the polkas Seufzer-Galopp
('Young Spirit') and the Indianer-Galopp
("Red Indian Galopp")?
JOHANN STRAUSS SR.
1b Frank Langella reprised his Tony-winning stage role as which US president for a forthcoming Ron Howard film?
RICHARD NIXON (in Frost/Nixon
2a Which sports trophy, a silver bowl of Paul Revere design, was donated by Harriot, the winner of the 1906 United States Women's Amateur Golf Championship and her sister Margaret, the winner in 1907, 1911 and 1912?
2b Which Austrian composer completed his first symphony, a work he nicknamed "the saucy maid", in 1866, but had his first great success with Symphony No. 4 in E Flat major, commonly known as the Romantic Symphony
3a St Augustine of Hippo was born in Tagaste in 354. Since renamed Souk Ahras, it is in which country?
3b Which biennial tournament for women golfers is named for Karsten ________, the Norwegian-American golf club manufacturer, who was the driving force behind its creation?
4a Josh Brolin took on the role of the 43rd US President in a forthcoming Oliver Stone movie. What is the film called?W.
4b The Roman Emperor Septimius Severus was born in Leptis Magna in 145. Now called Al Khums, it is in which country?
1a Who designed the cover for the Velvet Underground & Nico so-called 'Banana' album, and also conceived the artwork for the Rolling Stones's 1971 LP Sticky Fingers
1b Which cartoonist was hired by his friend Janis Joplin to draw the artwork for the cover of her band's album Cheap Thrills
, but rejected the chance to do one for the Rolling Stones because he hated their music?
2a Author of the novels Beautiful Star
and The Temple of the Golden Pavilion
, which Japanese writer committed ritual suicide at the Tokyo HQ of the Eastern Command of Japan's Self Defence Forces in 1970?
YUKIO MISHIMA aka KIMITAKE HIRAOKA
2b Which bird's name links a captain in Are You Being Served?
, the author of Nightmare Abbey
, and the Leeds Rhinos prop whose autobiography is called No White Flag
PEACOCK (Stephen, Thomas Love, Jamie)
3a Which bird's name links the lawyer-hero of To Kill a Mockingbird
, David Brent's obnoxious friend and travelling sales rep in The Office
, and the only posthumous winner of a Best Actor Oscar?
FINCH (Atticus, Chris, Peter)
3b Having had a top three hit in 1996 with 'You're Gorgeous', which British band's 2000 single 'The F-Word' later became the theme tune for Gordon Ramsay's cookery TV show of the same name?
4a Formed in Jacksonville, Florida in 1969, which group was formed by brothers Duane and Gregg and released the rock instrumental 'Jessica' in 1973 that later became the theme tune for Top Gear
ALLMAN BROTHERS BAND
4b Which Japanese writer's bestselling novels include The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle
, Norwegian Wood
and Kafka on the Shore
HARUKI MURAKAMIRound 3
1a What word do the chemical symbols for copper and tellurium form (in that order)?
1b Set up as a 'Wine Lodge' by eponymous founders Peter and Simon in Oldham in 1884, which pub chain went into administration on March 27 of this year?
2a Some Yates's had already been converted to pubs in which chain, known by a three-word name, and owned by the Luton-based Bay Restaurants Group?
SLUG AND LETTUCE
2b What word do the chemical symbols for iron and argon form?
3a The Chinese-French-born American, Yo-Yo Ma, and the German, Maria Kliegel, are world-renowned players of which musical instrument?
3b Winner of the 1999 Turner Prize, which video artist has made his debut as a feature film director with the Bobby Sands IRA film Hunger
and shares his name with a star of The Magnificent Seven
4a The 1998 film Love is the Devil
recounts the relationship between petty criminal George Dyer and which Irish-born painter, whose works include the Study After Velazquez
series and Three Studies for Figures at the Base of a Crucifixion
4b The Japanese woman Kieko Hashiguchi, and Bangladesh's Bari Siddiqui are virtuosos on which musical instrument?
1a In which country were the following people born: Marxist cricket writer CLR James; the first peer of African descent Learie Constantine; news presenter Trevor McDonald; footballer Dwight Yorke, and cricketer Brian Lara?
TRINIDAD & TOBAGO
1b Housed in three Washington DC buildings, which library holds the largest number of books in the world and is the world's largest library in terms of shelf space?
LIBRARY OF CONGRESS
2a The terrorist groups Harakat Mujahideen
and Lashkar e Tayyaba
seek independence for for which Indian-administered region?
2b The books Eight Men Out
by Eliot Asinof and Summer of '49
by David Halberstam centre on which sport?
3a Named after the area of the south-east London borough of Southwark where it is located, which library won its designers Alsop and Stormer the 2000 Stirling Prize?
3b The Islamic Army of Aden's aim is to establish a state under Sharia Law after overthrowing which country's government?
4a Which sport is central to The Miracle of Castel di Sangro
by Joe McGinniss and Provided You Don't Kiss Me
by Duncan Hamilton?
4b In which country were the following people born: the singer Rihanna; novelist George Lamming; sprinter Obadele Thompson, and the cricketers Frank Worrell and Garry Sobers?
1a Creating a massive observatory on the island of Hven in 1577 nine years before the invention of the telescope, which astronomer was the first person to map the stars?
1b In which year did the Acts of Union become law and unite the English and Scottish Parliaments to form the Parliament of a united Kingdom of Great Britain?
2a The French physician Ernest Duchesne became the first person to study the anti-microbial capabilities of which mould in 1897?
2b An amateur astronomer from Toxteth, Jeremiah Horrocks was the only person to predict, observe and record which event of 1639 that led to such crucial breakthroughs as the accurate measurement of the distance of the Sun from the Earth?
TRANSIT OF VENUS
3a In 1707, Roger Elliott was appointed by Queen Anne to become the first British Governor of which overseas territory?
3b Which Manchester backing group - comprised of Mike and Tony Mansfield and Robin MacDonald - became chart-toppers with a new lead vocalist from Liverpool in August 1963?
THE DAKOTAS (as in Billy J. Kramer)
4a Who formed a future chart-topping group in 1959 with his brother Fred, Les Chadwick and Arthur McMahon?
4b In 1829, Johann Buchner of Munich and Frenchman Henry Leroux became perhaps the first scientists to discover that which extract from willow trees provided pain relief for headaches?
1a Which West Yorkshire village is home - now a museum - to the Bronte family's parsonage at the top of the steep cobbled Main Street?
1b Which current Premier League football club won the first of their two First Division titles in 1936-37 season?
2a Which capital city of Central Asia has been previously known by the names Akmola, Akmolinsk, Tselinograd and Aqmola?
2b Stepping down as Leader of the House of Lords and Lord President of the Council, Baroness Ashton took up which position on October 3?
3a She replaced Peter Mandelson who is now the Secretary of State for what?
BUSINESS, ENTERPRISE AND REGULATORY REFORM
3b Charles Dickens died on June 9, 1870 in which mansion - the place he called his dream house - in the Kent village of Higham?
GAD'S HILL PLACE or GADSHILL PLACE
4a Which Premier League football team won their first First Division title in 1894, starting a run of six successive championship victories?
4b From the 1917 Russian Revolution until 1927, which Central Asian capital was renamed Poltoratsk after a local revolutionary and now has a name believed to derive from the Persian for "the City of Arsaces"?
1a Elected in 1993, Christian Ude is the current mayor of which city?
1b Jamie Oliver's new TV show Jamie's Ministry of Food
is his attempt to educate the nation about eating healthily. Starting at the local level, he has therefore been patronising the people of which South Yorkshire town?
2a Which bird, known by the scientific name Sturnus vulgaris
, topped the annual RSPB survey for the most common birds in London gardens in March?
2b However, the "Big Garden Birdwatch" at the end of January revealed the top garden bird is the Passer domesticus
. What is its common name?
HOUSE SPARROW or ENGLISH SPARROW (their name in the US)
3a The tragedy Oedipus
has been revived at the National Theatre with Ralph Fiennes in the title role. Which ancient Greek playwright wrote it?
3b Assuming office in 1994, Michael Haupl is the incumbent Mayor of which city?
4a What title is shared by a 1974 BBC documentary series about the Wilkins and a current Channel 4 reality show about the Hughes?
4b The play for actors and orchestras Every Good Boy Deserves Favour
is another forthcoming National Theatre revival. Which Czech-born playwright co-wrote it with Andre Previn?
TOM STOPPARDRound 8
1a Which rugby club is struggling with the RFU's decree that all Guinness Premiership teams must play in minimum 15,000-capacity stadiums by 2010 because its home, the Recreation Ground, can only hold 10,600 spectators?
1b The country's leading retailer of car parts and bicycles, which company was founded by Frederick Rushbrooke in Birmingham in 1892 before he moved to a store on the Leicester street that it is named after?
2a Fought between two parties of the Clan Donald sometime during the early 1480s, the naval clash the Battle of the Bloody Bay took place on the coast of which island two miles north of its chief town Tobermory?
2b The electrical retailer that claims "We live electricals", which 250-store chain was originally founded in 1933 by George Hollingberry with a name that originally preceded the words "... Battery Stores Limited"?
3a Taking place on October 2, 1263, which battle between King Hakon Hakonsson's Norwegian army and Scottish forces led by Alexander III takes its name from a North Ayrshire seaside town, whose original name means "the slopes" in Scots Gaelic?
BATTLE OF LARGS
3b Porto Santo is one of the only two inhabited islands in which Portuguese archipelago in the north Atlantic Ocean?
4a The site of a nature reserve formed in 1988, the Formigas are eight islets of which archipelago in the Atlantic Ocean?
4b Which other Guinness Premiership teams may have capacity problems in 2010 since its stadium Kingston Park can only hold 10,200 people?
Comedy character Alan Partridge named his son after which ABBA song?
What is Alan Partridge's middle name?
Who did Alan Partridge call "the band The Beatles could have been"?
Which crazed lunatic, who claims to be his "number one fan", nearly kidnaps Alan who duly calls him a "mentalist"?
Partridge presented which military-based quiz show on the cable station UK Conquest?
Which Archbishop of York led the victorious English forces against David II, King of Scotland, at the Battle of Neville's Cross on October 17, 1346?
Errol Walton Barrow was the first Prime Minister of which country?
Mike Nolan and Jay Aston were the bloke half of which British pop group, formed in 1981?
Which international rugby union team are known as "Los Teros"?
Agnes Dunbar was a mistress of which Scottish king, who was taken prisoner at the Battle of Neville's Cross in 1346 and kept as a prisoner in England for 11 years in London, Odiham Castle in Hampshire and Windsor Castle?
Administratively part of Shetland, which island is called Eileann nan Geansaidh
in Scottish Gaelic, has a name derived from the Norse for 'sheep island' and is the most remotely inhabited island in the UK, with a population of 70?
Which English soldier was raised to the peerage as Duke of Albemarle, Earl of Torrington in the county of Devon, Baron Beauchamp and Baron of Teyes by Charles II?
The Goldstein Brothers opened which major healthy and beauty chain in London in 1964 as "Leading supermarkets limited" until it got its current name during the same year its first outlet opened in Putney?
Which system of social reorganisation advocated by an eponymous French socialist (1772-1837) was based on the principle of natural affinities?
What term for the scientific study of the relationship between workers, their environment and macinery was introduced in 1949 by the English industrial adviser KFH Murrell?
(Ohmigod. I actually got the 'David II' question asked today and got it wrong.
I said 'James I' - moron. Maybe the memory ain't so good. Maybe, it can't be trusted and is one with the scoundrels and tricksters of this realm. And come to think of it, I got, the Superdrug question wrong in QLL this week too. Like, what the ...)PS
Yes, I know the following, among many other events that rank with the first Apollo moon landing, have happened: EQC2008 and AYAE, or as I like to call it AYAYAYAYAYAH. They will be commented and analysed upon in due course.
I would also like to sincerely apologie for claiming that Baku is a "Black Sea port" in a quiz that was published last week. I didn't verify it because I just happened to add it in at the very last microsend - and that's no lie - to make it more interesting than merely saying "capital city". Cos you know, it spices it up no end (i.e. makes it far more guessable ... DOH)